Adrenaline in Disagreement

Q&A Tuesday

Submitted Question

Tiger, why is it I get so worked up inside when talking to people I disagree with, or with those who disagree with me?
-Aaron B. California

Answer

I know the feeling; it’s as if there is tightening around the chest and breathing becomes slightly more difficult. Our face may turn a shade of red, or maybe a lump slowly builds up in our throat. And of course, the heart beats faster as it seems to be preparing for an epic battle. Does anyone else know this sensation I’m describing?

This internal reaction is a result of adrenaline pumping through our body. What is the actual (and natural) purpose for adrenaline?  How about to sustain the survival of our species. The moments you experience adrenaline in its natural state, is when your physical life or well being is on the line, and there exist the opportunity for potential physical harm. It’s a survival mechanism provided by nature.

An interesting thing about the mind, is it cannot tell the difference between an actual event and a make believe event; one that is believed in strongly. Therefore the mind will respond regardless if the event is actually true or not; its purpose is not to define truth, but rather to assist in your life experience. Adrenaline is a response based on the belief that I am in physical danger, now why in the world would you respond this way (with adrenaline) if all you’re engaged in is a disagreement?

What is it that is really being threatened, what is it we believe so strongly we are about to lose, more so than just an argument. Here’s the deal, we have attached our identity to our thoughts in our mind, and when those thoughts are being challenged, we take it as “we” are being challenged; our identity? But this isn’t what’s true. What’s true, is it is simply a thought being challenged, not you. If one were to truly understand this, there would be no need for the adrenaline. Remember, the adrenaline is only present because something you identify with is being threatened.

Here are things I keep in mind when having a conversation with someone who disagrees with me. (I say disagrees with “me,” because rarely do I find myself disagreeing with others.)

• You are correct in your way of thinking, because you have the right to think what you see fit.
• Your assumptions about me, are not truths about my true identity, they are only your opinion (thoughts), and your opinion of me is none of my business.
• Your aggression, is a result of your own inner conflict, not a result of what I choose to believe.
• I am you. You are I. Our conversation ultimately means nothing, our disagreement is only a disagreement with self. (skip this, if it doesn’t make sense to you.)

Hope this offers some sort of help, feel free to contact me with additional questions or insights. This topic could easily turn into 42 chapters, or 5 lectures. However it boils down to one thing… and that one thing is beyond my capacity to communicate it effectively with words. Namaste.

Did you find genuine value within this post? If you did, then most likely you know someone else who will as well. I invite you to share the goodness!
Namaste -Tigmonk